In the beginning, you will be pretty sure your nipples are going to revolt and jump off of your body to escape. They won’t, so long as you use nipple butter.

You will start saying things like “nipple butter” without batting an eye.

21 Things That Will Probably Happen To You While Breastfeeding
Paramount

You will have an incredible rack.

21 Things That Will Probably Happen To You While Breastfeeding
giphy.com

So firm. So perky. So fleeting.

You will understand the struggle of a dairy cow in a new way.

21 Things That Will Probably Happen To You While Breastfeeding
giphy.com

Pumpers gonna pump.

You will know the strange feeling of unsheathing a boob in public.

21 Things That Will Probably Happen To You While Breastfeeding
NBC

“Are my nipples covered? My nipples are covered, right?”

You will have to get used to the even stranger feeling of teenagers and general mouth breathers staring.

21 Things That Will Probably Happen To You While Breastfeeding
MGM

“Mind if I stare without blinking while you eat?” — them to your baby.

At some point, you will probably have to milk yourself.

21 Things That Will Probably Happen To You While Breastfeeding
giphy.com

¯_(ツ)_/¯. Happens.

The phrase “crying over spilled milk” will take on new meaning.

21 Things That Will Probably Happen To You While Breastfeeding
MLB

So will the phrase “liquid gold.”

You might breastfeed an adult at least once.

21 Things That Will Probably Happen To You While Breastfeeding
Twentieth Century Fox

What? Curiosity is weird.

You’ll realize that boob science and water balloon science are kind of the same.

21 Things That Will Probably Happen To You While Breastfeeding
giphy.com

The fuller they get, the further they shoot.

You’ll be tempted to see how far you can actually shoot it.

21 Things That Will Probably Happen To You While Breastfeeding
New Line Cinema

Suddenly little boys writing their names in the snow makes total sense.

At some point, you will succumb to curiosity and taste the stuff.

At some point, you will succumb to curiosity and taste the stuff.
tastychomps.com

It’s sweet and delicious, tbh.

You will watch as your sweet innocent baby transforms into a rabid boob shark.

21 Things That Will Probably Happen To You While Breastfeeding
giphy.com

How can something so small be so controlling?

If you like popping zits, you’re in luck. Clearing clots is WAY FUCKING BETTER/WORSE.

21 Things That Will Probably Happen To You While Breastfeeding
Jive Records

Imagine making fresh pasta…through your nipple.

You’ll probably leak through your shirt without noticing.

21 Things That Will Probably Happen To You While Breastfeeding
drmomma.org

You will never stop wondering if anyone else picked up on it before you did.

The urge to photograph your baby breastfeeding may become overwhelming.

It’s cool. Just remember your hashtag. #normalizebreastfeeding #beautifulbfing

You’ll discover the true functionality of that boob-less bra.

21 Things That Will Probably Happen To You While Breastfeeding
Via giphy.com

Direct access FTW.

Two words: Phantom letdown.

21 Things That Will Probably Happen To You While Breastfeeding
NBC

Are my boobs crying? They’re crying aren’t they?

You’ll drink like 500 milkshakes because people will tell you you can’t gain weight while breastfeeding, only to discover that those people were liars.

21 Things That Will Probably Happen To You While Breastfeeding
foxadhd.tumblr.com
21 Things That Will Probably Happen To You While Breastfeeding
foxadhd.tumblr.com

 

Nurses, doctors, and lactation consultants will manhandle your boobs like they’re not attached.

21 Things That Will Probably Happen To You While Breastfeeding
FOX

But they are attached, you guys. THEY ARE ATTACHED.

You will feel an incredible sense of pride with every ounce your baby gains.

21 Things That Will Probably Happen To You While Breastfeeding
giphy.com

You MADE THAT. G’head girl. High five yourself.

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